Selves; I see you, You See Me?

"Ohmygosh he is sOOOO cute"
"Did you add him on Facebook?"
"No but I found him, and look at all this ~stuff~ I found out!"
"Wow, he seems really cool~"

             This is an exaggerated example of what I think a lot of young people say when they meet someone that they want to know more about. We see someone we like and one of the first things that comes to our mind is that we want to know more, we want to see more—and we know where to find it.

      When it comes to social media, I think that I speak for many of us when I say that I love finding ~stuff~ out about people I'm interested in. We can simply find people's profiles and construct ideas of what we interpret their personality may be. Today our world is so connected through social medias that whether we're searching for a director, a famous singer, or that cute guy who sits across from your friends, we can usually find them on at least one of the world's many media platforms. Our initial or ongoing interest in someone is very natural; if we are interested in what we see, then we want to see more, know more. Thanks to the invention of medias such as Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook, we don't have to wait for that person to pass us by or hear about them from others, for we can now conveniently stalk them ourselves!

           Although looking at social medias can give us a sense of who someone may be, this approach has its drawbacks if we are using only social medias as our basis of a person. A media outlet is only one small part of us as a whole, and by looking at someone or ourselves through the lens of an internet outlet, we make ourselves subject to subconscious stereotyping, giving personality traits that may not be true, and falling victim to internet fallacy. This also removes us as humans from communicating interpersonally to making judgements impersonally through the lens of a stagnant computer screen.

          Via social media platforms, we tend to construct the version of ourselves we most want to be perceived as. On our profiles we can pick and choose what factors we want people to see; we have a vision of ourselves, and through ascribing ourselves as one thing or the other we assign ourselves an "identity and act it out" (Stewart, et. al, p.96). Hence, we only post the items we want to be perceived as, and not necessarily all that we want to share with the world. This can be limiting when thinking of ourselves in terms of how others will view us because if we share only what we think others want to see, we hide from ourselves our true natures for the sake of not breaking a status quo. We know people talk, and we know that they judge, and with social media this is more of a problem than ever. We are highly aware of the fact that if we do not talk with people directly, that if they find us on media they can construct their own ideas of us.

          Through this, social media is an intense breeding ground for subconscious stereotyping. On the opposite end of the avowing spectrum is ascribing, the process where we assign traits to someone which they "may or may not agree with" themselves (Stewart, et. al, p.96). Any predisposed ideas of someone pertaining to race, coolness, or other defining personality traits based on only appearances/brief notes falls into this category of profile-based stereotyping.

An example of this is when one may see someone they think they know, find out that they are certain religion, and change an opinion that they initially had of the person. They could see the religion and believe that the person is kinder, or see a religion (or lack of) that changes their desire to know the person better. This is an extreme example of religious stereotyping, and unfortunately an example of how the internet can make us impersonal to the point where we prefer to read and conclude about someone rather than ask them directly.

Through being aware of these two ends of our social media perception, we can take the step of taking the time to talk or message others ourselves to communicate interpersonally, rather than falling into an impersonal cycle of social-profiling and judging that cute guy that sits across from our friends.




                                                              Works Cited

Stewart, John. Zediker, Karen E. Witteborn, Saskia. Together Communicating Interpersonally A Social Construction Approach 6th Edition. Los Angeles: Roxbury Publishing Company, 2015. Print.

I want to be more like the sky

You do not need a reason
Of why you change with the season
Or why you let the winds blow
On their own to and fro

You welcome the birds
And are a canvas for flight
You tuck in the moon
With your blanket of night

You care for the forgotten
And watch over the weak
So that when they feel lonely
They have a friend in the bleak

You do not judge for complexion
Or race or perfection
Your justice is uncast
In social convection

You accept change
Graceful and serene
With every darkness endured
A new sun intervenes

The clouds always clear
And move on with your strength
Even when
The world is dirtied and muddied
Through pollution and ill intent
Somewhere a piece of you
Is free from lament

Teach me your ways
How to be whimsy and free
And create my own little sky
in the universe of me
So that in the darkness too
beautiful I can be

-nk

Clay

When we are born, we are new and unscathed.
Untouched by the world, a blank piece of clay.

We watch and we learn, the world sculpting us as we go.
Content with who we are, content with what we know.
Our childhood reigns and we seize the day,
we're happy with our lives, and our piece of clay.

But time draws on, and we acquire more niches
and cracks, more experience; our naivety on fringes

until the day our confidence is shattered
and our dreams are halted.
the clay that was a canvas
becomes quicksand exalted

we fear, the day ceases
our foundation shakes
we gather the pieces

and before we know we hate the sculpture we've become
what we were once confident in
we want made undone

and we become aware
of who we are and are not
and how the world shaped us
somewhere in its plot

so we try to shape and unshape
Undoing what we've become,
searching for a better us
to bring the innocence back that
we came from.

but the world has left its mark
as we reach for the stream we're from
water cannot fix
clay damaged by the sun.


-n.

A Thought On Social Acceptances

            Tonight as many other nights I find myself taking webcam selfies.
Yes, teenage girl, webcam open for constant entertainment, it's gonna happen. I like my webcam selfies because usually when I take these, I'm by myself, and nobody is around to comment on my facial demeanor or ask me why I make a certain face. And I like that they don't, because in my room I can be completely me. I don't have to worry about being judged by people.
             Sometimes I don't have a reason of why I like a certain picture. Sometimes I just like that it shows who I am inside. And although that may sound cheesy, take a moment to realize that some of the best things come covered in cheese.
              A lot of the time when I am on facebook, basically one of the birthplaces of internet social norms, I notice a trend in pictures typically accepted as good profile pics and/or get lots of likes. They're typically bright, photoshopped, person smiling, or modeling, yada yada. I must admit that presently my picture falls under that category. But am I the only one, who upon looking at my pic if it's overly glossy or I notice my slapped-on smile, and just think, ehk? I don't know dude but sometimes I just annoy the heck outta myself.
               More often times than not I find myself wanting to upload the picture from my webcam, the normal picture of me not smiling, just being Noelle and sitting and thinking. But then I remember the hassle of it, that people talk. Or moreof, people type. And moreof moreof, parental acceptance. Jinkies!
              There was once a time that I uploaded a picture of myself that I really liked, this was recently actually, and the sun shown on my face in a beautiful way and my eyes squinted in the sun. I love that picture because it showed what I went through that day. To me it showed all of my struggles and overcoming of things I go through, that I have anxieties, and that I love to make people laugh so that they don't feel bad, but to do so I have to overcome those anxieties. Yeah, gooey stuff like that. Anyway I posted it, and granted, I know anything posted on the internet is free-reign to whatever people's opinions and whatever they want to tell me. But within minutes I received comments such as 'I don't like this side of Noelle' and I quote 'you look pissed.'
              Ow my heart. Like okay, sorry I have emotions that aren't always peachy. Even my parents told me to change the image. And I know they mean it all in the best but what up? Perhaps it made other people uncomfortable because they saw vulnerability in themselves. Idk my dudes.

              I wish that we could just be, without worrying about being judged. And although some of us may be at a place where we put the opinions of others on the back burner, there is still that little section of our brains that goes in that annoying little squeaky voice, but what will people think of this? And my advice to that little squeaky voice? Tell it to go eat a pizza.
               Well I mean, sometimes that doesn't work, telling it to just go away. My advice for if you really are worried about what people think of you, or worrying whether or not your doing something cool or wrong or annoying, is just to let go. Realize that we are all people, we literally all have insecurities and at some point we all wonder about finding ourselves. Just look inside yourself and say, who cares if this is acceptable/cool/annoying? Anything you do can never please everyone, so why try to please anyone except your religious belief or yourself? If your social experiment works, cool. If not, cool! At least then you learn, and you learn more about yourself in the meantime.
                 One other thing I will add my friends, is that the first step to not judging yourself, is to not judge others. Everybody is fighting their own battle, so if someone does that embarrassing thing or that stupid annoying thing, remember they probably feel just as insecure about it as you would, they are learning as well.
                  If you ever feel sad remember that you don't need to have designer clothes to feel adequate, and you don't need to sway your own opinion to fit into a conversation even if they are the only people there to talk to. You're your own person, you have your own mind, and in time, you will find those that you can be around and communicate your thoughts entirely. As a teen I too must constantly remind myself that everything is simply a moment in time, I do not have to worry about the little things in life like an opinion. Opinion shmopinion!!
And so my friends I shall write this to you as I write it to myself.
Forget social norms. Just be you.




Please enjoy this gif I found of a Nicolas Cage teletubbies crossover

Deciding Professions in Adolescence

          I hear my family moving about downstairs while I sit here trying to figure out what to do with my life. My brother's lotr video game rings out and resonates upstairs into my room, which I don't mind but it makes me wish more that I could go on some sort of epic adventure and defeat orcs myself. But I must content my thoughts with general mind-switches and sighs, because the world of Lord of the Rings and the world where I am sitting on my bed in ballet slippers and hoodie are two very different things.
          My whole life I've been kinda just given things, how I believe a lot of middle-class white family offspring are, expected to simply sit by and get good grades and just let everything fall into place when I find my passion. I don't like doing that. I don't like just to sit by, so I try to become involved in everything I can like plays or clubs or my own little projects or whatever. And that's good, people say, start building up my skills because I have time to decide what I want to do. No pressure or anything, but that doesn't change the fact that the pressure is on.
         Then comes next year, senior year. Woo-hoo, the big she-bang, yada yada. Now we're expected to become grown, and expected to pick a college that we want to be at for the next four years of our life and pick a profession that we will most likely pursue for the rest of our lives. But I'm just a Noelle. I don't always get good grades, I haven't found a passion, and I hardly remember what I had for breakfast this morning. How can I be expected to pick something I want to do for the rest of my life reasonably?
         I suppose some people are born with a certain passion for what they want to do. Do they consider themselves lucky? For I find interest in so many things, and right now my mind bounces everywhere from the movie industry to architecture design to journalism to art. I have so many interests. I get bored easily and don't like to sit in one place very long and I like to be active in the world. I probably speak for many kids when I say I'm scared to narrow it down to one or two majors. It's weird that there are so many possibilities, and weirder yet that in the country we live in we can achieve any of them if we truly wanted. Which is cool I guess, but what now? How do we choose? It's not just some simple answer that someone can feed us. Our whole school career we've been expected to memorize answers and repeat them back to earn our intelligence. (Even though that doesn't even measure intelligence). I don't think I even trust the school system. Now we're expected to pay thousands for the same thing on a larger scale. Maybe it'll make more sense when I get there.
Maybe I'll just be a philosopher adventurer. That sounds cool.

A Brief Note On Kick-Butt Cinematography and Where To Find It

         Hello my friends! The hour grows late and I must start to alter my sleeping patterns so that the bat-velociraptor part of me (for more info please see last night's late-night article; unless you do not want to see a completly tired-enthused collection of writing schematics, if this is the case, then please don't) becomes less external. Also my mom just came in and told me to go to bed, so I regret to say that this article shall be a little hasty.
          One of my favorite things in the world right now is good cinematography and understanding it's ability to draw in the audience. How do you know if it's good cinematography you ask? Well I mean, there are multiple ways and some of it is completely opinion-based. Really what I think of as good cinematography are the camera shots that really capture the emotion of the scene, the dramatics, the gooey stuff. yeeah.
A more movie-scientific answer would be something like seeing that shots use the rule of thirds, continuity, that kind of stuff. And don't get me wrong that stuff's important too, but, man, any shot that captures emotion well just gets me whether it follows film guidelines or not.
       
          Here are my favorite types of cinematography right now and a bit on why I like the angles/moments created. Some of my favorites are from movies so I will mark all of those like this: ****______ SPOILER**** and end it like *****END SPOILER _______**** then it is up to you, young jedi, not to read any further. Use the force; the force of the brain. But just in case some of you guys accidentally skim it I'll keep the spoilers to a minimum.


NOELLE'S DECLASSIFIED LIFE SURVIVAL GUIDE TO COOL CINEMATOGRAPHY LATELY
Or, you know, cool camera doo-dads.

1) Sherlock (2010-2012). My gosh where do I even start I mean
Look

At

These

THINGS

There are so many fantastic examples of the flawless camera work but I can't find them all at the moment. The Sherlock series is so great at capturing the essence of what Sherlock and John are about along with any emotion that's being portrayed in the scene. The contrast is awesome, the colors are awesome, the show is awesome. The style is very polished, and very motivated, if that makes sense, by the characters.


****SPOILER SHERLOCK****
Especially in the scene after the death, if you pay close attention to the camera work there are people that hustle in front of the camera just a tad but it focuses on John's expression, showing how sort of small he becomes in the world at that point and showing how when you hear terrible news the world seems to slow/go out of focus around you, which the camera portrays literally.
****END SPOILER SHERLOCK****


2) Like Crazy (2011). Listen I'm not that into Drama-filled romance movies, but man the interesting camera work in this film (and Anton Yelchin) really kept me watching. Jump cuts were all over the place but intentional, but they worked and actually influenced some of my own work I did recently. The style really captures the simple hardships of love and life and keeps the movie feeling hyper-realistic and it's great. Especially the date scenes,









Leave one feeling as if they're actually there, hearing the waves and sound and stuff and the cinematography puts a great spin on the montage we see a bit later in the movie. The work has a sort of raw, realistic sort of vibe that I haven't experienced in any other film.







3) Star Trek Into FABULOUSNESS (Darkness) ((2013)).  Saw this in the theater. Twice. This is saying something because I don't go to the theater often my friends. The camera work in this film is very polished and exciting, and allows for an awesome visual experience in the simplest of scenes.


4) Finally, pretty much my favorite movie of all time, Master and Commander (2003). This movie takes place on a British war boat, or ship, more rather, in the early 1800's and follows the account of a skilled captain searching to capture a french fleet for the king. The whole movie allows you to actually become part of the crew, and the movie bumped up my level of understanding of old timey sailing by 200%. Not only is the camera work swell (haha) but the plot is perfect, the cast is phenomenal, and script is entirely believable and not too sappy or anything and basically perfect.

---------------

And furthermore! For any cinematography needed references or ventures, 
Here are just some other really fabulous videos for inspiration/viewing pleasure. The first is an in-depth cosplay of the Joker, second is a commercial my friend reblogged for some perfume commercial or something. I'll do a more in-depth analysis perhaps of specific genres later, or if you have any questions/are in need of suggestions for inspiration feel free to comment and I'll try to help.

                              Joker:

                     Perfume Commercial Blog Thing:

Goodnight you all, and I hope you have a lovely evening. :]

A Thought About Being Successful and Another Thing About Goals

         Hello my friends! A lot recently I have been thinking about what it takes to be a successful person. I've been trying to figure out what it means, and the aspects of, and all in between. I've been looking up kids around my age who are said to have done awesome things, and I've been researching the lives of fictional characters even to discover what made them awesome (i/e Sherlock Holmes and when he started crime solving), and real people such as acclaimed actors or young authors. I've been looking for trends---- anything, that draws these people together, and seeing what perhaps may bind them together.
That thing, I've come to notice is a combination of extreme motivation, a bit of luck, and perhaps you've guessed it, goals. Ding ding ding! GOALS!
        If not one of the first steps of accomplishing great things, having a goal to do so is definitely a step in the right direction. Now I know what you're maybe thinking. But Noelle! I have goals, how do I start? Or, perhaps, some of you already have goals and you're working on them. Cool beans! Completing anything I set out to do I know always leaves me with a warm fuzzy feeling inside. But sometimes I get so caught up in my current life that I soon find myself with a mound of goals! A whole kaboodle that I can hardly sort through, and I try to work on all of them but they just pile up, and I end up reaching none of them, and then I get sad, and that's just not a pretty sight.

         Basically I have about 2,000,000,584,734,592,834.9 goals for my life, and my question is, How the heck do I pick which one to start on first? 
I'm thinkin' some of you might be thinking similar questions, so here's what I gathered, and perhaps maybe I can help you into a mind set to help you achieve your goals as well. Or even, help you to jump-start into wanting to make goals.


NOELLE'S DECLASSIFIED LIFE SURVIVAL GUIDE TO GOALS
Or just you know, goal guide.

1) First and foremost; Pick something you want to get done eventually. Picking something that you want done eventually is the first step to getting that something done sooner than eventually.

2) Pick something that interests you. This can go for almost anything. Jobs, charities, heck, T.V. shows, movies. Make sure that the goal you want to accomplish will eventually benefit you, someone who lives with you, or something/someone that you care deeply about. If you're not interested in something in any way, it probably will not get done. Try to find something you enjoy about the goal, if it has to be done and you don't want to do it. Do you wanna lose that 5 pounds? Do you want to take out the trash? Do you want that oscar? Great! You're a step closer to picking out your goal.

3) Which one is the most important one to get done? Well I suppose to choose what goal to get done, you gotta pick the goal that has to be done first. Any deadlines, like homework, or bills/taxes to be paid, trash taken out, galaxies to save from certain doom. You know, that kind of stuff. Yeah, pick the one that has to be done, and soon.

4) SBSKGFBS. Okay so say you don't have an immediate galaxy to save. Say that all of your goals are of the same level of importance. Honestly, then just pick one that you enjoy working toward, and Nike; just do it. That may be hard to say, but once you get going on something, much like eating brownies, sometimes it's hard to stop. If you get started on a goal sometimes you feel inspired and keep doing it. AWESOME! That's the point!! Perseverance when doing a job is key, and with that my friends, is how any goal becomes underway and eventually completed.

1) IT'S OKAY TO START SMALL. People sometimes make goals out to be these humungo-almost-impossible-to-obtain things, when in reality, a goal can be so simple. Floss twice a day, write a poem once a day, compliment a stranger. ANY SMALL GOAL CAN BE A GOOD GOAL.

2) Don't let anyone tell you your goal is stupid if it's for self-betterment or a good cause. If you strongly believe in something, stick to that belief. If you have a goal you don't want to be easily swayed away from your path just because someone is simply not as into your interest as you are. If you want to be that hot-dog-eating-arm-wrestling knitting champion, you be that hot dog eating arm-wrestling knitting champion.

3) Don't be close-minded, either. This is something I have to work on. Be open to suggestions that people may give you. Listening to other's opinions can be extremely helpful in guiding you to achieve your goal. Sometimes people will make a point that you had not thought of, and perhaps give you a different aspect than from where you come from. Also on that note, listen to elders. They've lived longer than you and have experienced a bunch of life. They may be able to help you if you have any questions.

4) Try using sites like this! http://www.43things.com/ This is a site that thousands and thousands of people use to keep track of their goals and progress. Through this you can read posts people write on how they achieved certain goals, and you can help others achieve goals as well. Mega cool.

5) Disengage the procrastination monster. Raaawwr! Yes this I most have trouble with. Especially when your goal involves a computer, it is SO EASY to disconnect thoughts from the task at hand to the newest gadget in the science in science technological stuff and stuff. But friends once you have a goal, you gotta stick to the goal. And I know sometimes with internet procrastination I use thoughts like Oh yes but this will make me smarter and that's a goal I have! Trust me, there is plenty of time to be smarter and read about Rihanna or whatever after your goal is done.

6) Make lists!! OOOH! Lists! Lists are so cool to organize your thoughts!! Going back up to the list of stuff I made before (ooo list-ception) lists can help you organize, prioritize, interest-ize, and help with all sorts of important factors of goal-making. They can also help you to get your ideas down onto paper so that you don't forget them while completing one goal or another and whatnot.

7) Pick one goal, and focus on it. One goal alone can be hard enough to accomplish. When you have a hundred goals flying around your head like a hundred little butterflies, singling one goal out is so difficult. I'm not saying that you can't focus on more than one, but I know for me sometimes the progress can become slow. Focusing on one can help the goal get complete sooner.Once it's out of the way, that can clear you to start on the next goal! Sometimes achieving one goal can lead to achieving another! 
Ever seen Napoleon Dynamite?

 Wanting to help his friend become the high school class president, and wanting to make a huge impact on the student body, he set a goal to dance on stage and preform a kick-butt routine. And guess what!? He did it. Napoleon bought a dance tape, learned the moves and eventually Pedro became his school's student president, and in turn, Napoleon got a girlfriend, learned about himself, and gained confidence.
So what am I saying?
       Dude anyone can be a Napoleon Dynamite. Set your mind to something, and it can be done. Your mind is one of your most powerful assets, and putting it to good use is an awesome, awesome feeling.
And who knows? You may find that completing a goal leads you to discover more about yourself and who you are, and really, that in itself is an accomplishment.